Rant Thread

[Ana]

So sorry for your loss
I'm sure she heard you

[OnyxHydra]

Varethyn

I know there's no real good words to say in this situation, so just many, many internet hugs for you in this hard time.

Thank you, both. It means more than you know.
Sadly she passed away over night. I feel awful that I never spoke to her since she left but I got the chance to say good bye. I can only hope she heard me.

Sorry, I've been a bit absent, but I am so sorry for your loss. I am positive that she heard you. Wishing you love, support, and healing.

[Valnaaros]

I'm very sorry for your loss, Var. It is always difficult to lose someone.

[Varethyn]

Thank you all It's really hard as I hadn't spoken to her in many years as she'd remarried for a third time, which I hadn't forgiven her for. And while I managed to get that last phone call in on what turned out to be the final day I can't help but feel guilty for it and realise I'll never get the chance to see her again.

I really did love and miss her. It just never felt like the right time and neither of us liked being the one who had to go first, leaving us in an endless loop of stubborn refusal to call the other.

Do yourselves a favour guys. If you're stuck in a similar rift... just do it. You never know if you'll get that chance again.

[Wain]

Oh Var, I'm so sorry Complicated relationships can make the grief even worse at times. Please take care. *hugs*

[Varethyn]

Late in replying but thank you, Wain The funeral was a couple of weeks ago (hard to think it's gone by so quickly) so I've at least had closure on that now.

---

New rant. Maybe it's just me being paranoid because of past events but I've now had two, completely unrelated instances of a guy asking me if I'd be interested in creating a specifically female romantic partner for their RP characters; one in WoW/various stuff and one in D&D. It's awkward enough that they specifically want the character to be female when my go-to characters are male elves, but I'm worried it's because I'm female-presenting irl and they're using it as an excuse to try and romance me.

For context I do know these people, being an old WoW GM and my current D&D DM (funny that) respectively. It's just that I've already had to turn down two guys before who tried to flirt with and/or date me (though tbf one was a young kid trying too hard and the other was a nice co-worker I barely knew).

[Syleye]

I have been trying to use my art as a way to supplement the family income due to my being disabled. I run 2 etsy stores, redbubble and deviant art . People tell me all the time my stuff is good and yet sales are pretty non existent. I think that speaks louder than words and now am afraid I have wasted the past 3 years. Just seriously depressing.

[Bowno]

I think it's very important to remember that right now a LOT of people are really struggling with money and are not spending it on luxury stuff at the moment.
I don't think it has anything to do with you or your art quality, I think its more because of how the world is still a mess and people are struggling to even afford rent and food.

[Anyia]

I'll second that. In the past I've been able to spend money on nice art, but now that money has gone to inflation and tax and rate rises

[Ana]

finally got the purple bear to spawn with trap.. then another hunter comes and kills it
fianlly get Basilofos, King of the Hill to come down to me.. mid tame another hunter comes down and kill it

in both cases i ask kindly to not attack it and let me tame it.. but noooo.. why are ppl like that

[Renard]

Here's my Rant:

I am a horde beastmaster hunter. I needed Lord Al' whatever his name is (Uldum Rare) for my rares collection. Horde members were parading their alts to try and get the toy even when I asked politely if I could get the tame and even pay gold for them to stand down. Finally, last night I got the tame because an ALLY actually backed off and let me have it. Horde on Misha treat each other like garbage in other things too.

AND why didn't Blizzard allow the pet collection to have an interface like it does now earlier?!!! I had to let go of some pets to make room for others because of that old stable system. Now I have to go get some back.

[Varethyn]

I suffer mild depression and generalised anxiety.
I'm unemployed, struggling to find something because of those features.
I feel like I have no future.
No friends.
My step-mother suffers Alzheimer's, which is progressively getting worse.
She's started physically attacking me when we're together with no supervision.
My mother recently passed away and I am racked with severe guilt for not speaking to her before she fell ill.
I feel alone.
Hated.
Unwanted.
Useless.

I make myself feel better by making other people happy.
I gave you so much art.
So many gifts, including a rare event Pokémon I happened to have multiple of.
We shared stories.
I went out of my way to get stuff for you, to help you progress.
I supported you in your time of need.
You were the best friend I ever had.

Then you abandoned me when I needed you the most.
For an incredibly stupid reason.
Because of a game.

But by all means, I'm the insensitive one for making jokes and trying to cope.

[Ana]

I sooo get that feeling... i had a really weird year that I havent written about much here but I do get you.
Im here if you need a shoulder to cry or shout on

[Dewclaw]

Var. <3

I can relate. I'm a ball of anxiety and so introverted it's not even funny.

[Varethyn]

Sorry to keep harping on about this, but this is one of few places I feel comfortable any more and my mental state has fluctuated so much it's not even funny. The past year has been filled with nothing but grief. While there was only one funeral I feel like I'm grieving three deaths.

Almost a year ago (how has it been a year already?) my mother passed away from leukaemia, having survived surgery for cancer. It was incredibly unfair and I've been saddled with regret for not speaking to her until her final moments. I still doubt she even heard me no matter how many people insist hearing is the last sense to give way, or that she could understand if she did.

My step-mother has been fighting a losing battle against Alzheimer's the last few years. It's progressively getting worse and is taking away her memories, her physical strength and control, and the ability to tell what is real and what isn't. She actively lashes out at me, either not recognising who I am or imagining the situation to be so much worse than it is, and in the last few months especially she's also physically attacked me.

Lastly, a friendship I thought was strong, one I had managed to keep going and enjoy despite warnings from others who saw red flags. We had our ups and downs for sure, along with months of silence, but when a certain game came out last year things became increasingly selfish and toxic. I had to put it to rest when possessive hyper-fixation overwrote any care for my feelings, with the final nail being demands for artwork while I was actively grieving.

I feel so extremely alone and can no longer trust those I consider friends to truly be my friend and instead simply tolerate me to keep me happy and quiet.

[Ana]

I feel you

I felt very....outside myself last year too. The person i trusted most for 27 years suddenly decided to leave me.. took me a great deal of time to come to terms with it.. tbh not sure i have dealt with it all now
I felt a part of me go away ..a major part of my life was gone.
In the midst of the all I also had to decide to take a chance to let someone else into my life again. I did and they still around.. part of me still goes .."but what about 10,15, 20 years from now?"

It is so so so hard when you feel betrayed/cast aside from ppl you once trusted or was a part of your life

huge hugs to you

[Dewclaw]

{{{hugs}}} to you both

[Varethyn]

I really am so sorry, Ana. It truly is the worst feeling. But I'm glad you've got someone if only for now

[Varethyn]

I don't understand what I've done wrong.

Whatever it is, I'm sorry.

I don't know who needs to hear it but I really am sorry.

[Dewclaw]

My husband has made a LOT of poor choices in life. I stayed because I'm stupid and mostly because of the kitties we have. The thought of them being terrified in a shelter horrifies me. I value their well being over my own 100%. I work full time, I work very hard, but because of his poor life choices, and my own decision to stay, I am facing homelessness. Not that the house is worth keeping. The roof needs replacing, the neighbors leave a lot to be desired, and a little over a week ago, the plumbing backed up. We suspect a collapsed pipe. I've been hand washing laundry and showering under an outside spigot and all I want is for this nightmare to end and to feel safe. Not all of this is my husband's fault, let me be clear on that. But I feel like a lot of it stems from a butterfly effect from his poor life choices. Either way, if I vanish within the next few months, that's why. Hoping to still be kicking, but things looks pretty bleak.