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Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 11:07 am
by Vephriel
I slept in my chair last night holding him. Didn't get much sleep, still crying.
I really appreciate everyone's thoughts and wishes, they mean so much to me. I wish I could say it's something he's going to get better from, but I can tell I'm losing him. He's weaker today, he doesn't even seem to have the strength to move. The vet said that she could tell his liver was failing, he's showing signs of jaundice and fatty liver, but that those weren't causes but symptoms of the underlying problem. She said while they could try to go in and treat the liver, it wouldn't be helping the real issue, and I can't bear the thought of putting him through the additional testing. He'd have to stay there at the clinic force-fed through tubes and poked with needles and hooked up with IVs in some cold sterile environment by himself, and I don't want to put him through that. They strongly suspect feline leukemia, and while I know it's hard not to be certain, I just don't want to force him to keep going if he's only going to get worse in time.
He's cradled in my lap right now...I'm just going to stay with him all day and keep him warm and safe and let him know how much he's loved.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 11:11 am
by Teigan
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Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 11:41 am
by Niabi
Awe, I truly am sorry hun.
Given the information you provided, I agree that euthanizing him would be the most humane option available. Whatever he does have is basically shutting down his system and will end in a drawn out and uncomfortable death.
I know it won't help your situation much, but if it's ok with you, I'd like to light a candle tonight on behalf of your beloved Ichabod. It's just something I like to do for friends of mine who have lost someone near and dear to them (as an alternative to praying, since I am not religious).
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 1:06 pm
by AdamSavage
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 2:23 pm
by Mozag

To you and your gorgeous boy. You know you're doing the best thing for him, and while it's cold comfort now, you are wise enough to know it is the greatest kindness you can give him. I wish you strength for the coming ordeal on Saturday, and know that all our thoughts go with you and Ichabod.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 3:54 pm
by Vephriel
Thank you everyone, and of course Niabi, that would mean a lot to me.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 4:53 pm
by Lotusii
I'm so sorry about how things turned out for you and your sweet looking boy there. Losing pets never gets any easier and I'm sure he really, truly loves you and knows you deeply care for him.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 5:03 pm
by Ijomi
You both are in the thoughts and prayers of myself and my fiance, Veph. I can see in that photo that beautiful boy is reaching out not just to be comforted, but to comfort back.
I know words don't often help, but this is something I was given that comforted me through the death of my father and my aunt.
You can shed tears that she is gone,
or you can smile because she has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that she'll come back,
or you can open your eyes and see all she's left.
Your heart can be empty because you can't see her,
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember her only that she is gone,
or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what she'd want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on.
- David Harkins.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 9:24 pm
by Teigan
.
The Rainbow Bridge
inspired by a Norse legend
By the edge of a woods, at the foot of a hill,
Is a lush, green meadow where time stands still.
Where the friends of man and woman do run,
When their time on earth is over and done.
For here, between this world and the next,
Is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.
On this golden land, they wait and they play,
Till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.
No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,
For here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.
Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,
Their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.
They romp through the grass, without even a care,
Until one day they start, and sniff at the air.
All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,
Then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.
For just at that instant, their eyes have met;
Together again, both person and pet.
So they run to each other, these friends from long past,
The time of their parting is over at last.
The sadness they felt while they were apart,
Has turned into joy once more in each heart.
They embrace with a love that will last forever,
And then, side-by-side, they cross over… together.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 10:12 pm
by zedxrgal
I know there are no words that can be spoken to ease the pain you're feeling. I'm so sorry doll. I'll burn some sage and say a prayer that the good spirits come and wash over you and dear kitty and give some comfort in this time.
If you need an ear or an eshoulder to cry on please do not hesitate to let me know.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 11:04 pm
by Nahale
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Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 11:17 pm
by cowmuflage
I'd give you internet hugs but I don't know how much good that will do. I could draw a memorial picture of the two of you if you like.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 11:37 pm
by Silivren
While this poem is not specifically about the loss of a pet.. This poem is inscribed on my Grandmothers tombstone and appears in WoW as a quest poem.. It's lovely and I hope it brings you some happiness as it comforts me <3
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 4:34 am
by Nili
My heart goes out to you today. We love you here.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 4:55 am
by Bonita
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 8:31 am
by Schwert
Be there for him, ok?
That's the best thing you can do for him.
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 10:02 am
by Vephriel
leaving for the vets now, havent slept...just going to go in my pajamas with a tearstained face
everything hurts
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 10:12 am
by Jaronn
Oh, no, I'm so, so sorry.
I've lost two cats to forms of cancer (unrelated and years apart), but I know it is absolutely terrible.
I can't offer much but support and online hugs, but I will offer those.
Once again, I'm so sorry.
This is a poem that I found a while ago, that gave me some comfort.
May I Go
Do you think the time is right?
May I say goodbye to pain filled days and endless nights?
I've lived my life and done my best, an example tried to be.
So can I take that step beyond, and set my spirit free?
I didn't want to go at first, I fought with all my might.
But something seems to draw me now to a warm and living light.
I want to go, I really do; it's difficult to stay.
But I will try as best I can to live just one more day.
To give you time to care for me and share your love and fears.
I know you're sad and afraid, because I see your tears.
I'll not be far, I promise that, and hope you'll always know,
That my spirit will be close to you wherever you may go.
Thank you so for loving me. You know I love you too,
And that's why it's hard to say goodbye and end this life with you.
So hold me now just one more time and let me hear you say,
Because you care so much for me, you'll let me go today.
by Susan A. Jackson
Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 10:21 am
by Magli
Aw, Veph, I'm so so sorry to read this.

Re: Worried sick about my cat
Posted: Sat Sep 17, 2011 12:23 pm
by Vephriel
He's gone.
We brought him wrapped in his favourite blanket, the one that came with him when we adopted him. I held him the entire time. When they gave him the sedative he just sleepily layed his head against my arm and purred. They gave him a catheter and I just kept petting him as the final injection came and he slipped away. I sat there for a while crying and cradling him, then kissed his head and left him wrapped up and comfortable as though he were just asleep.
Rest in peace Ichabod. <3