WoW Petopia Community

WTF pizza pizza... I ordered the dinner and a movie special... Figuring a night at the movies would be something to try and cheer me up. Well... So much for that. Apparently (and there's no disclaimer what so ever about the coupons being "subject to availability") they ran out of coupons, so I get screwed. I could have gotten a cheaper deal from a different delivery place too, if I had known. I really wanted that movie night out Instead, I got something going wrong making me feel even more like crap. Well.. you know what.. Fuck you pizza pizza...

Don't know if I can really call this a rant... But close enough I guess.

Alright, so I'm in my first year of college, second semester. I go to a community college that's like a 30 min. drive and I don't know anyone there not do I really have any interest in making new friends... Especially when I can't let my friends from high school go. I miss them terribly. It was normal for me to miss them a bit every now and then, but now I'm at the point where I'm crying every night. I'm making some plans to meet up with two that out studying abroad this summer but I'm still just terribly depressed about all of this. I just feel so lonely, and as dearly as I love my online friends it's just not enough at this point. I need to see my old friends and talk to them and give them hugs. I wish I could meet up with all of them but some are in different cities and states and others I'm afraid to contact. I feel like they might be too busy and I'm afraid that if they are they'll have to decline and I'm not sure I could handle that at this point...

But god... I've always appreciated my friends dearly but never this much. I just really need them right now.

I still feel like crap. I don't know why. I'm so tired of this. Seriously tired of all of this. I don't even know why I feel like crap any more. I just want it to be over. I WISH I could do something to make it be over. But that's not gonna happen. Seriously... So tired...

More rant spam... But honestly.. I don't know what else to do. I feel SO extremely alone right now. Nobody is online to talk me down.. or keep me company. I feel like I'm worthless. I feel like.. what's the point in life anymore if this is how I'm always going to feel. I'm starting to forget what it was like before this. Deep down I can think that eventually I'll be like I was before... but... It's been several weeks, I think.. and time, even when I'm not depressed, is often wonky in my head... It's even worse when I am depressed. I feel like I can't remember the last time I hung out with friends... Or ACTUALLY had fun. Sure there's been a few small things that gave momentary boosts to my mood, but they never lasted longer than half an hour.

I'm alone. Nobody wants to be around me... If something happened... nobody would even know. I don't even know if they'd REALLY care if/when they did find out. Or would it just be one of those "I didn't realize how bad it was... It's a shame, she was a nice person" and then after a couple of weeks.. or a month.. People don't even remember who I am.

I want my friends right now. REALLY bad. But I can't have them. I try to keep myself distracted.. but it doesn't work. Yes... I'm keeping up with my sleeping meds.. I just don't know if they're really working. I'm not waking up AS much.. but I still don't always sleep through the night. And I don't always feel more rested when I do wake up.. And yes... I made my follow up appointment.. it's a week from today...

Oh.. and I'm still not really eating... Sometimes I can eat a little bit.. Others I can't keep anything solid down (sometimes not even anything liquid...). Since just before exams (2nd week of april) I've lost probably around 8lbs. that's an average of almost 4 lbs a week... I know it's not healthy.. But I'm doing the best I can.. It's worse to eat and be sick than it is to just try and get as much essential nutrients as possible while consuming little enough that I'm not likely to throw it back up...

I just don't know how much longer I can do this.. Honestly. The thoughts in my head are driving me crazy. Even when I think I'm starting to feel better.. I'll get up to go get a drink and... I just don't know if I can take it much longer... I'm so tired...

RNG my arse - exact same drops 3 days in a row from a heroic boss is possible yes, but shouldn't be the frickin NORM.

WTB some incremental way of buying boss drops - I don't care if it takes 2 weeks of runs but there needs to be some worst case limit on how much BS a person has to go through for something that's not a legendary.

Uptight hunters. No I don't care about how you tamed that thing stop trying to make me get one >:(

Worba wrote:RNG my arse - exact same drops 3 days in a row from a heroic boss is possible yes, but shouldn't be the frickin NORM.

WTB some incremental way of buying boss drops - I don't care if it takes 2 weeks of runs but there needs to be some worst case limit on how much BS a person has to go through for something that's not a legendary.

18 kills of Yor.

I haven't seen the axe once.

Know that feel.

So the possums and pukekos have ate all our fruit this year basicly. All we can do if put netting up to keep the pukekos out and shoo them off when we see them but the possums well they wont be getting such a nice ending we are borrowing my grandads trap this weekend hopefully we will get the buggers!

Fucking firefox! Stop crashing all the time! >/

Meh, it's rather hard to write these papers when I need a five minute break every two sentences. Giieeef meds.

Kraai wrote:

Worba wrote:RNG my arse - exact same drops 3 days in a row from a heroic boss is possible yes, but shouldn't be the frickin NORM.

WTB some incremental way of buying boss drops - I don't care if it takes 2 weeks of runs but there needs to be some worst case limit on how much BS a person has to go through for something that's not a legendary.

18 kills of Yor.

I haven't seen the axe once.

Know that feel.

/nodnod

My personal worst was back in 3.3 when I ran Pit of Saron (aka P.O.S.) 21 times for the felglacier bolter. Honestly if the RNG would even just *try* to look random now and then, I think I could live with that - it's when it not only 1) refuses to drop my gear but also 2) gets stuck on certain other items to the point where I can actually predict what's going to drop ahead of time... yeah. Like that.

Worba wrote:

Kraai wrote:

Worba wrote:RNG my arse - exact same drops 3 days in a row from a heroic boss is possible yes, but shouldn't be the frickin NORM.

WTB some incremental way of buying boss drops - I don't care if it takes 2 weeks of runs but there needs to be some worst case limit on how much BS a person has to go through for something that's not a legendary.

18 kills of Yor.

I haven't seen the axe once.

Know that feel.

/nodnod

My personal worst was back in 3.3 when I ran Pit of Saron (aka P.O.S.) 21 times for the felglacier bolter. Honestly if the RNG would even just *try* to look random now and then, I think I could live with that - it's when it not only 1) refuses to drop my gear but also 2) gets stuck on certain other items to the point where I can actually predict what's going to drop ahead of time... yeah. Like that.

I got the cross bow first run on my hunter, never got the 2 handed axe to drop off the last boss for any my melee dps until I got something better and oh the shield from the Frozen Halls for tanking 75 runs till I got it. Got tired of everyone and their brother grabbing it for off spec -eyes a shaman that was just totally utterly fail.-

Ha that reminds me, I was running P.O.S. on both my hunter and my fury warrior - the crossbow dropped nearly every time for my warrior and the 2h ax dropped nearly every time for my hunter.

Just to make it extra special.

75 runs though... man. My sanity would have gone bai bai after maybe 20... tops.

Worba wrote:Ha that reminds me, I was running P.O.S. on both my hunter and my fury warrior - the crossbow dropped nearly every time for my warrior and the 2h ax dropped nearly every time for my hunter.

Just to make it extra special.

75 runs though... man. My sanity would have gone bai bai after maybe 20... tops.

I lost my sanity in high school so it was no big deal after about the 20th most of the time it was guild runs and I got a lot of partice in tanking on my pally. Also use to make gold off the rogues who wanted the one handed sword that dropped off the boss too as that dropped every damn fricken time.

It makes so much sense that shaman can need on +dodge gear.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

My two teeth on my left side are decaying(one of them was the wisdom tooth that grew sideways) and now it chipped some more, leaving a very sharp point thats cutting my tongue. ><;

Thought I was feeling better, but now I don't know Yesterday wasn't too bad, but I'm feeling the depression a bit again today. I wish I could hang out with my friends to try and solidify the non-depressed feelings while I'm having them Oh well... I'll just hang out in my room with my kitty and my new friend.. (bought myself a stuffed animal yesterday)

I'm just being paranoid... i know I am... Right..? I'm trying so hard to believe it.. but I can't... Not until something PROVES that I'm just being paranoid... I hate this feeling. I'm trying SO HARD to believe that the things I'm worrying about right now aren't true. But I can't do it. It's definitely not helping the depression...

It really bothers me that people continue to insult my intelligence. Just because I have a learning disability, does not make me stupid. If you don't let me do stuff on my own, I will never learn! If I can't do it or I'm not sure how to, I'm not afraid to ask for help. Taking me by the hand all the time, will only piss me off.. *end rant*

I just stalked through my own deviant art, deleting a lot of the old crap I had there, and realized I drew hair the way I liked to wear it on myself back then. It's amusing, and crappy looking. I've drawn all the guys with creepy looking nests on their heads too. I suck.