its wow or me

[Redith]

so i think this is funny. My girlfriend who has been my girlfriend for 3 months told me today shes cool with me doing wow while i am deployed here in bahrain but when i get back to the states i have to stop.
I guess her last boyfriend was realy into wow as well. So much in fact while he was in a raid she came in in new hot victorias secret stuff and he was more interested in the game. I allrady know my answer. While i do like wow, I wont lie if my girl came in like that id be like".........GuysIGottaGo" lol

[Saturo]

Tell her that you're not like that, and then show her? xD

[Nevar]

Tell her that you're not like that, and then show her? xD

^^^^ thats my opinion as well

[Dulanie]

he did what?!?!?!?! If any girl I was with did that I'd hit g2g then /camp while the hearth was casting, and I wouldn't bother turning the computer off. lol

[Sarayana]

I understand where she's coming from, but there are plenty of examples of people that are able to show moderation when it comes to WoW. She's assuming the game was the problem in her previous relationship, when really the problem was with her ex. Show her that you're not like that, that WoW is simply a hobby and a place to meet with friends you can't meet with outside the game, and perhaps she'll be convinced.

Personally, I'd try to get her to try out the game. I always have the most fun when my hubby and I are playing together.

[Dulanie]

Her's an idea......Bring her here. Just keep her away from Saturo and Ryno. Who knows she may convert to the worship of P. Dawg.

[Slickrock]

On another note.. not sure you want to be in a relationship where those kinds of demands are being made this early in the relationship.

Sure you want to exercise moderation, but you shouldn't be paying for the other guy being a fool.

[mpd_84]

giving you an ultimatum like that as your being deployed comes off as really bad form,regardless of how addicted her ex may or may not have been...

[Sarayana]

not sure you want to be in a relationship where those kinds of demands are being made this early in the relationship.

Sure you want to exercise moderation, but you shouldn't be paying for the other guy being a fool.

giving you an ultimatum like that as your being deployed comes off as really bad form,regardless of how addicted her ex may or may not have been...

I know what you guys are saying, but I'd be really careful to pass judgment when we don't know more about the situation or their relationship. Maybe part of it is simply that she misses him terribly and wants him 100% to herself when he returns.

[Aleu]

This is why I refuse to go into a relationship unless the guy either plays this game, or is at least casual gamer like myself. (Also has to be an animal lover. :3) >_>

Anyways, she does sound like she is assuming the game is the problem and not the persons self control. It might be up to you to show her the game isn't bad if she is assuming it is.

[Noor]

Try that when you've been married 4 1/2 years. I can flash my husband my boobs and he won't notice. Too busy with EQ2.

[Jakkra]

Gotta say, I agree 100% with all of what Sarayana has said.

If your girlfriend could possibly try playing the game with you, that helps A LOT. My husband used to be obsessed with FFXI and I loathed the game so much, because I wasn't a part of it. But now that I've played wow with him, I completely get it, and I have the most fun in game when we're doing stuff together. He's also currently deployed, and we will both be taking a break from wow when he comes home, in order to focus on spending time together. So I get where you're coming from.

[Redith]

Thanks for all your support and advice, but this isnt the first problem. She has made..ALOT of demands about what she exects from me.
1. She wants to try and talk me out of being a law enforcement officer, but she says that she COULD overlook
2. No firearms will ever be alowed on the property we own. (kinda cocky since this is the third month and we havent even spoke about having an OUR property) Plus im a hunter, and will be a cop. Im not saying i will have an AK47 laying on the coffee table but there will be guns at some point.
3. She has a problem with large breed dogs...Large breed meaning anything bigger then a pug. That includes my 4 fave breeds Labs, German shepards, boxers, and American Bulldog. Saying she will NEVER own dogs like that, granted I thought i could tlk her into at least labs.
4. this wow thing. I dont care even if she drops this topic the other 3 are enough to throw up warnings.

[Vephriel]

Hmm, that does seem to throw up some red flags. I can't speak too much on the subject since I don't know her or the specific details, but from what you've said so far I think you may want to have a talk.

There are bound to be traits about one another that you don't like or disagree on - that's the case in every relationship. However I don't think it's fair to make so many blatant demands, especially so early in the relationship. It seems disrespectful to me, and a relationship should be more about equality than control. There will be time enough to iron out little wrinkles as you go, but it seems presumptuous to make so many demands right off the bat without bothering to confront the underlying problems at all.

I dunno, that's my two cents I guess.

[Saturo]

I'm with Veph here. It sounds a bit bad to make such demands that early. But we don't know her, so...

[Sarayana]

I agree 100% with Veph, in light of those other demands, the WoW thing seems the least of it... These demands definitely warrant a long heart-to-heart about what you and she both want out of the relationship - a strong, lasting relationship is built on mutual respect and compromise, not one-sided demands like "I want..." and "I don't want..." It has to be a give and take.

Best of luck in figuring out what path you will take.

[Chrizesu]

I think from what you said you should run for it. She sounds like you could have a tyrannical bitch on your hands.

Edit: The majority of my family has mental illness so some of those people I have to deal with. >_<

[Dizzy]

why dont' you just get her into wow?

i don't understand couples that are like.. one shop-a-holic GF and one gamer BF.

like.. isn' t that hella boring?

Why not be with someone you enjoy doing the things you like with?

I LOVE seeing couples in game/games.

but i will never understand couples who don't play SOMETHING together.

shopping isn't THAT fun. xD

[Kryte]

why dont' you just get her into wow?

i don't understand couples that are like.. one shop-a-holic GF and one gamer BF.

like.. isn' t that hella boring?

Why not be with someone you enjoy doing the things you like with?

I LOVE seeing couples in game/games.

but i will never understand couples who don't play SOMETHING together.

shopping isn't THAT fun. xD

Well, a gamer dating a non-gamer isn't problematic if they share other interests. It's almost inevitable that a pair of people will have differences in what they like, and gaming may be one of those things. Now, in the case that a couple has nothing they can do together besides dinner and a movie, THEN you've got a problem.

As for the situation at hand... It definitely seems like she's crossing a line in making all these demands. That's a situation that I'd personally walk away from, but I don't know all the details. I agree that a long talk with her is probably in order.

[Sukurachi]

Redith, I would run for the ills, if I were you.
She sounds like a complete control freak.

When I started reading this thread I thought to myself that the "stop WoW or else" type of demand was a serious warning sign.

However, the new "conditions" you've mentioned are more than warning signs. This woman is potentially very problematic. Imagine that she's trying to control these relatively simple aspects of your life (and, well, the whole law-enforcement thing isn't "simple" but it's rather "fundamental" to who you are), what happens when you have been together longer and some more serious issues arise? Will she forever be "demanding" that you be the one making compromises?

My husband and I have been together 10 years now (well, technically, only my "husband" for 3 months now), and we are both moderate gamers, except we don't actually play together all that much, mostly because of our work schedules. But we do lots of things together, and neither of us would dream of "demanding" anything of the other.