Rescue - need some advice

[Dewclaw]

Back in July, a starving grey cat showed up on my back porch. He was covered in burrs and skeletal. Off to the vet we went, and he was diagnosed with dental disease, but he was in no shape for surgery. He wouldn't survive, weighing at a meager 4 pounds and estimated at 10+ years of age. Longer story shorter, I got some weight on him and 2 surgeries later, he can eat pain free, but he's obviously been through some serious trauma. He was neutered, so someone dumped him or he got lost somehow. He has attached himself to me. He's not social with anyone else. The vet released him to me following his surgery because they knew I could get him to eat when they could not. I've been gentle, kind, and patient with him. Here's his situation. He won't potty unless I go with him, except at night. At night he stays in a safe room and he will mostly use the litter box on his own. I say mostly because sometimes he'll wet his bed. During the day, unless I come get him and carry him to the box, he'll hold it until he wets himself. I've tried moving the box to a room he likes to sleep in, but when I encouraged him to use it he just sat there and finally meowed/cried in distress, and I took him to his safe room box, where he pee'd without incident. I'm not sure why he won't go there on his own, he moves freely otherwise to find places to sleep, etc. He's been tested for medical problems that might cause this, but was finally diagnosed with emotional ones. Any ideas on how I can help this kitty go potty by himself? I'm not sure I'll always be available to take him, like if I find a full time job, for example. I'm only working part time right now.

[Bulletdance]

Cats are extremely sensitive about where they do their business. It is however highly unusual for any animal to go to the bathroom where they sleep. I can't be sure if this will work for you, when I had a problem with my cat thinking outside the box I found out that if a cat has a painful bowl movement in a litter box or is scared in that box they will then associate the box with that feeling. I got a new box and my cat went in it without any problems. You could also make sure its really clean since some cats are very sensitive to that. I'm a little worried though since it takes your cat so long to get comfortable with things this may not be the answer,but its worth a shot. I hope everything works out for you and that your new kitty gets more comfortable

[Dewclaw]

You are correct, it is unusual for a cat to soil where they sleep, but this cat is not usual in any manner of the word. I don't know what he went through before he came to me, but he's obviously been very traumatized. His soiling the bed is a result of holding it until I come to take him potty. His box is cleaned twice a day. I'll try buying him a new one and see if that works. it's possible he associates it with discomfort since he was constipated as a result of severe malnutrition when he first arrived. I had to help him eliminate it was so bad.

[Rhyela]

You're amazing Dewclaw. I don't know that many people would have the heart and the patience to help that cat in the way that you're helping him. Unfortunately I don't have any advice for you, but I just wanted to say that I'm very impressed and touched by your commitment to this animal, and that I wish you the best.

[Sarayana]

I agree 100% with Rhy, what an amazing heart you have, Dewclaw.

On the matter of the litter box, is it possibly the sand? I don't know what kind of sand you're using, but if it's scented or large granules it might be uncomfortable for him?

Aside from that, I know some vets are able to work with owners of traumatised pets to help the pets overcome their issues... Have you tried talking to your vet about that? Perhaps do a search for your area and see if anyone near you offer that kind of service. My main concern is how very taxing this kind of neediness becomes, it might cause some resentment down the line when you're stressed/overworked and have to deal with this on top of everything (I'm talking in general terms here, not about you in particular - people often don't handle stress well).

My husband and I had a kitten that had been malnourished and got severe joint pain because of a lack of calcium in her diet. She became very skiddish, peed all over the house, and was afraid of people no matter how much kindness you showed her as you held her because it hurt her to be picked up when she was little. Even after the pain went away, she retained those habits. We were recommended Feliway to help her, it's an artificial feline pheromone that just works to soothe stressed animals. It looks like one of those plug-in air fresheners and disperses the pheromone in the air. Link here: http://www.feliway.com/us
It might help your kitty if this behaviour is stress-related.

Good luck!

[Dewclaw]

Feliway is good stuff. I have it.

He doesn't seem to respond to it, but it helped one of my other rescues a lot. Thanks for the input all.

[Kalliope]

Poor lil' kitty...hope that changing the box completely will work!

[Teigan]

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[TygerDarkstorm]

Like some of the others, I don't have more advice than what's been given, but I wanted to stop in and say what an amazing person you are for helping this poor little cat out. I wish you the best of luck with him.

[zedxrgal]

Thank you for taking the little one in and loving him. He clearly needs it and more then deserves it.
Cats also see in color so be mindful that certain colors could also be triggering these bad memories. Red, blue, green and yellow are the main colors and of course black at white. Find the colors that the cat sleeps on and is the most relaxed around do your best to match it with everything for him. Cats love positive rewards also just as much as any animal. Find a reward that he loves and use it till it no longer works. Most cats also love catnip to. After using his box on his own maybe a catnip reward would help or something along those lines. There are clearly 'happy' things with this kitty otherwise he wouldn't trust you either. If food is something he likes perfect reward.
Find what he does love and exploit it to the highest degree to reinforce the behaviors you want to see from him. Also the little boxes with the domes or covers on them seem to work really well for insecure kitties.

It may also help him mentally and physical if a schedule was written out and followed so he has set times to do his kitty business. It may take time but he may learn the schedule to the point it clicks in his brain that it's "oh it's 8am time to potty" and he'll go on his own. At the very least you both will be on a schedule that will hopefully make things easier and less sporadic.

It's not much but I hope it helps.

[Dewclaw]

The reward system is a good idea, but so far all I've been able to use is affection, which he loves. Food doesn't work because he associated it with pain for so long, and he's very limited in what he can eat (soup/very soft mushy only, only canine teeth left). He had a catnip scratching board that he liked, but he peed on it, so it had to be thrown away. He's not big into toys because he's sort of elderly.

As for colors, he likes the carpet in the dining room, and since it's sort of green viney, it may be hard to match, but I will try.

I gave him a domed box for a while, but he ended up sleeping in it, so I took it away. I didn't want him to associate bedding with pottying any more than he already does. He liked the security it offered, so I made him a bed out of a cardboard box that he likes.

Scheduling. He's already on one. Feeding times, potty times, and bedtime are all set. So far, though, he still won't go by himself. He'll hold it until he wets himself or I come get him. This was done with trial and error to learn when his times to go were.

I'm hoping that time will bring him around.

[Sarayana]

When I trained my cats to have their claws clipped, I just used a pinch of straight cat nip. Worked like a charm, a pinch on the floor and they'd roll in it, lick it, get high... Anyway, it's an option.

And yes, lots and lots of patience. Time will fix things, it's just probably going to be a long time.

[Dewclaw]

*leaves a trail of catnip crumbs leading to the litter box*

[Sarayana]

Hey, if it works!!!

[Dewclaw]

Bought him a brand new box and new sand to try. As I had tried before, I put it close to where he likes to sleep, thinking that perhaps he wasn't comfortable walking through the kitchen to get to his box in his safe room. When I took him to the box, he sat there for about 5 minutes, and then looked up and hissed before slinking out of the box and onto my lap. At that point, I knew pushing him would do no good, so I took him where I usually carry him, and he went. The idea I had was that if it's close to his sleeping spot, that he might get up and go on his own, but so far, no luck.

[Sarayana]

Aww.

[Dewclaw]

Well I had just about given up on getting him to use his new box, but this morning he did...all by himself! Maybe the first step to getting him to go by himself all the time.

[Sarayana]

Yay! Progress!!! Sounds like things are moving very well in the right direction. Congrats.

[Mania]

Excellent news!

[Neith]

It sounds like he's faced a lot of unreasonable punishment, and probably pretty horrendous too because cats are normally very thick skinned. Poor guy It could be that he has been hurt when his former owners wouldn't feed him and he would try to find food for himself, and wouldn't give him adequate ways to go to the bathroom but would beat him for finally relieving himself. It really breaks my heart Giving him lots of love and affection and rewarding him every time he eats his food and goes to the bathroom will help reassure him that it's okay to go potty in the litterbox and okay to eat out of the cat bowl. It may be too that it's uncomfortable getting into it for him, there might be a different kind of litterbox out there that is set lower to the ground, if he is as emotionally injured as he sounds then I can't imagine him scratching the litter out of the box, there might be a way to rig your own litterbox that doesn't involve him having to hop in or do any leg movements that involve having to bring his legs up high -- he could have similar injuries to abused children who get pulled on their arms really hard, which might leave him with a lot of discomfort in certain positions.

Sigh. I really hope he gets better. My sister took a young cat to live with her in her co-op in college and the poor thing came back such a mess, I am still pretty angry with her about it and it's been years. The cat (named Ninja) was suffering so much anxiety she was obsessively pulling out her own fur, and it took me well over a year to finally get her through that and into finally feeling like she was in a safe place once we brought her out of there and to my parents house. Lots of very slow movement, and gentleness.

I learned early on with cats that giving them "mom-baths" can really relax them as well, you have to find out what their own individual ideal pressure from your hand is, but it's typically a kind of firm pressure that they wont' feel threatened by, and you stroke them from head to tail, with the flat of your whole hand ~ basically you're acting like your hand is mimicking the tongue of their mother grooming them from when they were a kitten.

Anyway I am probably just rambling here. It is heartbreaking to hear just how much hurt this poor guy must have suffered, and I am glad he is being given a second chance.