How do you handle harassment?

[Karathyriel]

I remember having that situation once.
It started when I was asking what I had to do on my first Naxxramas run. The guy was a warlock.

I ignored it, just let him have a go on me and not even replying.

After about an hour, the MT threatened to kick him if he didn't stop talking sh*t and started playing and, the best part, when we cleared Naxx, one of the healers said:
"I had to heal you very often. I had to resurrect you 7 times. I didn't have to do any of that to the hunter. Makes you wonder who actually understood how to play his character, doesn't it?"

The warlock left the raid immediately. I switched of my microphone and started laughing.

Just try to do your best. It will turn out to be good enough in the end most of the times.

[Dragonpuff]

I'm lucky I haven't had to deal with this kind of flack yet, but I'm sure it'll happened sooner or later.

The only thing I can remember that very barely fits this topic is that once, in the 60-70 level bracket, I was fishing in Hillsbrad to get the water-logged journal that teaches you fish tracking. Some random level 70 person ran up and stopped beside me, then whispered me to go to Outland to get a better bow, then left. Had a LOLWut? moment there.

[Sarayana]

Mm, I personally wouldn't do the whole 'Misdirect then leave the group laughing' thing....honestly it sort of brings you down to their level, and then it gives them the satisfaction of knowing they pissed you off enough for you do pull such a thing. Same thing for yelling insults back at them. Nothing you say is going to work, it will just dig yourself deeper the more you try to argue with them.

It's far better to just keep a level head (as difficult as it can be), and act mature the entire time. That way when you leave you can feel proud that they didn't get any sort of reaction or satisfaction from you, and that they'll realize they were being idiots anyways.

Words of wisdom, Veph.

[Nick]

Usually I don't get this kind of crap from anyone in groups. But it's probably cause I usually only use Dungeon Finder when someone in my guild wants to bring me along for a dungeon.

And I'm usually the quiet one too; I only really talk unless someone specifically talks to me or asks something I know the answer to.

If I ever did get an arsehole in my group, my friend would prolly chew them out or I'd just ignore them.
I'm usually MM spec'd, but I've been getting back into BM lately.

[Kalliope]

After about an hour, the MT threatened to kick him if he didn't stop talking sh*t and started playing and, the best part, when we cleared Naxx, one of the healers said:
"I had to heal you very often. I had to resurrect you 7 times. I didn't have to do any of that to the hunter. Makes you wonder who actually understood how to play his character, doesn't it?"

I love when stuff like this happens. I tend to stick up for the people being wronged in that sort of situation, regardless of what character I'm on (though it's easiest on a healer).

(P.S. Lifetap management is hard.)

[Saturo]

Tell me about it!

It was during the boss that deals 75% damage to everyone, and I noticed I was getting a lot of healing. So I lifetap. And I get healed. So I lifetap again. "Stop it u retard!". Didn't realize he was talking to me, and he heals one last time. So I'm at around 50% when I notice he's casting, so I say "HEAL!". It was quite embarrasing...

[Demon]

never, ever, ever, ever tell the heals to heal... your death is almost 100% assured T_T

Corisynth, my draenei priestess, got bitched at for being sh*** heals. in RFC. at lvl 15. on the first run. Sooo... I used my items.. You know.. those +SP and +SPR items that you're not supposed to have as a lowbie? Those things that shouldn't even be possible to get at such a low level? I enchanted my staff, drank a +SP potion, ate some mana restorative foods since the paly at the time didn't know you're not supposed to buff casters with might (no, I didn't kill him) and started doing heals. My crit percentage went up, and my heals were critting once every five casts. I was healing over the tank's FULL health. that was over 500 - 750 on a crit (normally impossible) I was then told to up my heals.... again... because I was a sh*** healer.

The mage asked what the paladin was talking about.

"She's not healing me! She's not even healing like she should be! Stupid Dic priest."

Everyone, and I means EVERYONE was silent. I got three seperate whispers telling me I was the best healer they'd ever seen, the Mage telling me that the Paladin was obviously using an outdated heal metre. I (being rather new to addons) asked what a heal meter was. I was then asked what type of heal bot I was using. To which I questioned what a heal bot was.

Long story short (HA!) Mage told everyone I wasn't using any healing addons. Paly chucked a bitch fit, the other two started asking how I could be so good without a heal bot. Mage tried to inform the paly that a Disc priest's main ability is shielding. Paly said "A Dic priest is a DIC!" Someone innitiated the group vote to kick, I didn't click anything, and the Paly got kicked with a 3/2 vote. We got a rogue after that, and he was told immediately not to insult the heals because, "She's the best we've seen in any lowbie dungeon!". I was happier than anything that day <3


Demon,

[Kalliope]

lol, that's terrible. I don't even understand what that tank was complaining about! If he wasn't dying, then what the hell was his problem? x_x

I love these people who have no clue, but act superior. Morons. >_<

Good thing the mage actually understood how disc priests work. And I'm impressed that you knew how to heal as disc with the bubbles and all at such a low level! You don't even have the bubble-buffing talents yet, which makes it harder to maintain that sort of rotation.

[Anansi]

I haven't taken any flak on my Hunter at all, but I have had similar experiences to Demon while playing my Shaman healer. There's a certain, albeit petty, satisfaction to letting a useless or obnoxious party member die. And when they complain, I like to inform them that I heal those contributing to the group. They usually either shut up or leave, either is fine with me.

It's often the healer who gets blamed for a group dying, and truth be told sometimes that is the case. However, more often than not it's because the group is not up to the content and no matter how good a healer I am, dammit I'm a doctor not a miracle worker! I can't make other players not suck or make the content easier. When a tank goes down from full health to dead in less than the 1.4 seconds it takes me to cast Healing Wave, that's not my fault.
Healers are often burdened with the responsibility to get a group through. They see you're well geared and they think all is well. In those cases the best way to deal with it is to drop group. Either they will find a really uber healer to carry them through or they will fail and maybe, just maybe, quietly realise they were below the content.

[Gala]

coming from someone who used to be a serious raider, the people who freak out about people who dont raid, care about gear, etc are in the minority

We all play the game differently. It's my $15 a month; I play how i want. You play how you want. Who am I to judge?

Sadly, people are dumb.

Keep doing your thing.

[Sarayana]

I totally agree with you Anansi. I was just discussing this in another forum, where a girl had been verbally beaten down for her supposed "sucky heals"... when the tank was in blood presence.

The way I see it, it comes down to this: when things are all over the place and beating on people, the tank gets blamed, cause heck, his job is to keep aggro. Nobody stops to think that it's everyone's job to manage their own threat. When people are dying, the healer gets blamed, cause heck, it's his job to keep things alive. Nobody stops to think that it's everyone's job not to stand in stupid shit or, you know, tank without being def capped.. that kind of thing.

Everyone has their own role, but they also need to have situational awareness and know that they have what it takes to handle the fights (like you said, Anansi, you can't make the content easier). Blaming the tank and healer is just easier than considering whether or not there's something you could do different next time. (This also reminds me of a great blog post I read recently!)

You've got to grow thick skin in this game, cause every so often you'll run into assholes. /ignore and leaving party will save you a lot of frustration and anger, let me tell ya.

[FlightofthePhoenix]

I've found some good ways for relieving hostility in a group. For one, be friendly! I start off with "Greetings", "Hey" or "Hi everyone". I tell people if I'm new to the dungeon and any concerns. I enjoy playful banter and if I made a mistake I explain. If something went wrong, I try to find out why and give suggestions. If I know someone's trying something out, then I'll help them out.

I never bother the healer. No matter what the rest of the group is doing, I'll try to keep the healer alive, even if I end up dying myself. If someone wants to give me grief, I often end up getting the support of the rest of the group. I tell them why I may not be perfect but I try and let my DPS speak for itself. If they still want trouble, I look at them and tell them if something's not quite right so they realize we all have flaws. If they're still being unpleasant and upsetting others, I vote to kick. I'd rather have a friendly group with a few wipes than a death march with someone with a God complex. I only leave if something came up in real life or we agree that it's going nowhere. If something in game has gotten to me, I can make sure the others are taken care of and walk away. I can always vent to my S/O, who plays too. I figure most of the people giving grief are younger than me, anyway. Good luck!

[Kalliope]

I never bother the healer. No matter what the rest of the group is doing, I'll try to keep the healer alive, even if I end up dying myself.

Oh man....

I don't get the chance to do this as often as I used to, since I'm usually running with solid players.

But I used to do this all the time on whatever character I was on. It might've cost me some dps, but I prided myself on knowing that the healer was safe.

This is a big reason I love tanking on my pally. I'm VERY quick with BoPs. Most of the time, taunting is enough, but there's something especially heroic about landing a well-timed (necessary) BoP on a healer.

I miss doing this more often than not these days. In addition to the solid healers who don't need protection, I've seen some really godawful healers with bad attitudes and have stopped protecting them. They think that just because they're healing, they're safe from getting kicked if they throw an occasional heal. That's not healing. -_- Not if people are dying to things they're supposed to be healed through. *sigh* Sorry, that's another rant for another thread.

[Demon]

Eh... I just got another one.. -.-

Liyr, my big boy main priest (49), just got chewed out because he wasn't dispelling the silence effect that all the magic using classes (bar the pally tank) were getting from the Dinos in Maraudon. I tried informing them that they were too close. I then got bitched at saying that they had to run to the tank when they got aggro.

I'm sitting there, trying to understand this. My shields are instant. The second I see anyone under attack (especially a mage/warlock/shaman/hunter with an interruptable AoE channel..) I bubble them. I tried explaining that being close to the dinos gave them the silence, and that they should stay a healthy 30ft seeing as they're a caster class..

I shoulda just kept my mouth shut... -.-

F this and F that and F you and your mother was a F'ing (insert noun/verb of coice).... That was a a few days back.... I kinda haven't been on WoW since that incident... It's times like that I feel like quitting, but after a while playing "Mabinogi" anyone would get drawn back to WoW... dear gods the insane amount of time/failure rate/instant death ratio.. actually, I think I'll start playing Gorvul again. or another shaman. Gotta love them heals <3

Demon,

[Azzrazzah]

Ignoreing is the best, don't let them intimidate you.. Just try to get on with clearing what needs to be done.. If they persist; give a message to groupwide stating that because of a certain someone and their antics, your gonna leave the group, if your doing your part, then maybe the rest of the group will side with you and kick out the other.. If not then recue for another group.. You don't have to take anything from anybody.. This is just a game and bullying has no place in it... The dungon finder makes it very easy to get another group fast, put the past behind you and play the game. I don't know if your a member of a Guild yet or not; sometimes it's just best to run with guildies. And if guildies are the problem, talk to the Guild Master.. If he can't help, find another guild.. But in the end, you will be paying to play this game (If you decide to go for it) so you have to make yourself happy with the game... There are Aholes every where in life... Sometimes they are easy to deal with and sometimes not.. Your life, your happiness

[Sarayana]

Aww man, sorry to hear that Demon.

I find it amazing how often you'll find these "L2PLAYNOOB!!!" people in lower level dungeons, that themselves have no clue. They're so confident that meleeing as a hunter, as an example, is the right way to do things. I hope they learn before long, but geez... it's not them playing wrong that grinds my gears, it's their attitude that they know the game and you're a looser for trying to play another way or suggesting that they use their ranged weapon or whatnot. *sigh*

Come play your shammy on Nesingwary, Demon! That's my go-to whenever I get frustrated. If nothing else, our guild will support you when you QQ about these idiots.

[Kalliope]

Liyr, my big boy main priest (49), just got chewed out because he wasn't dispelling the silence effect that all the magic using classes (bar the pally tank) were getting from the Dinos in Maraudon. I tried informing them that they were too close. I then got bitched at saying that they had to run to the tank when they got aggro.

LOL!

Terrible dps.

BTW, the tank does get silenced as well, which is godawful on pallies and pretty annoying on other classes as well. (No shouts, taunts, etc.)

it's not them playing wrong that grinds my gears, it's their attitude that they know the game and you're a looser for trying to play another way or suggesting that they use their ranged weapon or whatnot. *sigh*

This. Thisthisthisthisthis.

This is the attitude that will get people kicked from my randoms. Period. I can handle carrying casual players, but when they get rude about it, bitchgottago. Like that DTK run I was talking about in gchat yesterday: we could have carried the terrible healer through the entire instance, since I was keeping myself alive fine. But he was RUDE, so he got the boot.

As a counterpoint, my druid got randomed into CoS with an undergeared group (minus the tank, who had some pieces of 219/226 loot - while not "geared," he was overgeared for heroics). Hell, the hunter was mainhanding the level 70 version of the horseman's blade, so I figured he at least was a brand new 80. The run went smoothly, due to everyone doing what they were supposed to be doing. I helped dps, which meant that we still made the drake timer. The hunter won and was very pleased. After 14-15 runs, he'd never been in a group who could make the timer. >_< I wished I could have sat him down and talked gear with him, cause undoubtedly, that was a huge reason why his groups wouldn't make it. Sigh. I felt bad for him, cause I don't think he knew... But yeah, I was very pleased with the run, especially since three people left off the top, so it could have been a complete disaster. See, these are the sort of players I have no issue carrying through a heroic.

[FlightofthePhoenix]

As a counterpoint, my druid got randomed into CoS with an undergeared group (minus the tank, who had some pieces of 219/226 loot - while not "geared," he was overgeared for heroics). Hell, the hunter was mainhanding the level 70 version of the horseman's blade. The run went smoothly, due to everyone doing what they were supposed to be doing. I helped dps, which meant that we still made the drake timer. The hunter won and was very pleased. After 14-15 runs, he'd never been in a group who could make the timer. >_< I wished I could have sat him down and talked gear with him, cause undoubtedly, that was a huge reason why his groups wouldn't make it. Sigh. I felt bad for him, cause I don't think he knew... But yeah, I was very pleased with the run, especially since three people left off the top, so it could have been a complete disaster. See, these are the sort of players I have no issue carrying through a heroic.

This gives me hope. I'm a fairly new player, with only a couple toons. I just don't know as much as people who have been playing for years. Haven't raided yet, haven't hit 80 yet. I steadily level my Death Knight and hunter, but I'm still learning. I explain this to people and will take advice. Because of my Death Knight, I'm able to help new Death Knights. Other than that... no. I will readily admit if I don't know something. I'm happy when people are patient with me. However, sometimes I still get jerks who rub this in my face.

I had one guy who kept ragging on me in a dungeon about my low DPS. I pointed out I was at least three levels below everyone else. Still, he kept going. I told him picking on someone at my level wasn't really fair. Fortunately most people are smarter than that. The good news is that most PUGs are short so you shouldn't have to deal with an irritating person too long. Though, when you get a person who is willing to get you through a long dungeon or help you tame a pet it's amazing. For everyone jerk you meet there's another person who is really kind.

(Much thanks to the paladin who helped me tame my white kitty after several failed attempts)

[Vespias]

Since the old days I've learned it's best to just ignore them and go about your business. I understand now that everybody knows how to play every class at a much better level than I do so why argue. But a funny story...way back I had a group and was laying back doing my hunter thing decently. The group leader had loot on free for all and since I was ranged way back I wasn't getting anything. So I nicely asked if they wouldn't mind leaving some for me to loot and I got this reply..."Just be a good little hunter and stay back and don't worry about looting." Took me about 10 seconds to aggro the entire room before feigning death. Once they wiped I got up, looted the bodies they had killed and then hearthed. Good little hunter my ass....

[FlightofthePhoenix]

Since the old days I've learned it's best to just ignore them and go about your business. I understand now that everybody knows how to play every class at a much better level than I do so why argue. But a funny story...way back I had a group and was laying back doing my hunter thing decently. The group leader had loot on free for all and since I was ranged way back I wasn't getting anything. So I nicely asked if they wouldn't mind leaving some for me to loot and I got this reply..."Just be a good little hunter and stay back and don't worry about looting." Took me about 10 seconds to aggro the entire room before feigning death. Once they wiped I got up, looted the bodies they had killed and then hearthed. Good little hunter my ass....

Thank you for reminding me of running through dungeons at a lower level and getting screwed over as ranged. I pleaded with them to wait up and leave me some things (especially as I needed materials for Engineering) but they didn't. I was too patient then. I never run anything on free for all unless I'm running a lower level person through.