Teenage Girls.

[Sickhuntz56]

I don't really know why I'm making this post. I guess just to vent. But teenage girls are so rude and judgemental. I'm 16, so it's hard enough...but seriously? Most girls just ignore me straight up, for no reason. The ones who do reply, however, are just plain rude, or call me weird, or ugly. They say things like "Umm....you're ugly, LOL. bye" or "i dont know you, bye". I mean correct me if im wrong, but you have to TALK to someone in order to know them, right? I'm tired of being judged by looks. I think everyone is made beautiful. AND I'm tired of girls going ON and ON about how all guys are the same, want sex, etc....HELLO? NOT TRUE. i think sex is for MARRIED COUPLES. Don't overlook me just because of my looks. Everyone is beautiful. EVERYONE. I don't know why i did this....just had to say all of that.

[Sukurachi]

well, apparently, these girls are NOT beautiful.. where it counts.

the only thing I can tell you is that teenagers are in the midst of finding themselves, it's an identity crisis of sorts.
and for far too many, the only way to FIND themselves, is by comparing themselves in some way with others around them.

It's not a modern phenomenon. It's always been like that.

Don't forget that teens brains are not fully developed yet. Impulse control in particular is one of the areas of the brain that is not yet fully developed.

Just think of the groups of goths who go around talking about non-comformity... while conforming to their own goth identity and assimilating into that collective. There's nothing "wrong" with it, but it is a demonstration of how the young mind works.

I know it's feeble comfort, but.. it WILL get better as you age.
For now, concentrate on school. I know, very little comfort. But one day, you WILL appreciate it.
And doing so will actually make YOU a better person.

[Chrizesu]

It's mostly a culture thing. There are good girls out there, but you won't find them anywhere near the 'popular' crowd. Being young can be rough, but it'll get better as your peers mature. Still, even at my age you'll find those who swim on the shallow end, in a manner of speaking.

[Bonita]

I tended to avoid people like that in school. Could never understand why a few of my friends were buddies with girls like that.

[Sickhuntz56]

I don't group people. I think of everyone as just, themselves. There are no types of people. Everybody is the same in different ways. I just wanna know what I am doing wrong.

[Sickhuntz56]

and it's EVERY GIRL i talk to. seriously.

[Dakonic]

It's mostly a culture thing. There are good girls out there, but you won't find them anywhere near the 'popular' crowd. Being young can be rough, but it'll get better as your peers mature. Still, even at my age you'll find those who swim on the shallow end, in a manner of speaking.

^agreed, there will always be "bad apples", I'm 16 as well, but I guess getting into the dog community and owning a breed of dog that is commonly "attacked" by people, I've grown a thick skin.

Don't let them drag you down to their level

[Bonita]

Seems like youre just unlucky then if its every girl you talk too. There are nice girls out there who tend not to judge until they know you.

[cowmuflage]

It'll get better with age you just have to deal with it at the moment.

[GormanGhaste]

I would say either be more selective about who you approach, or if even the nicest girls seem standoffish to you, re-think how you are approaching them. Join some student groups or volunteer, so you can get to know them in a more relaxed setting and have something in common to talk about. Spend more time listening than talking. And try not to take rebuffs personally: I know when I was young and approached by guys I didn't know, I tended to freeze up. I was even accused of being 'stuck-up', when I was just tongue-tied and painfully shy.

[Nili]

Copy-paste from the rant thread:

*hugs Sickhuntz*

I've been where you are. I was new in my 8th grade class and had gained weight during the summer from being homeschooled. That was awesome, first year back to public school after two years and I just wanted to crawl back in my bed and hide from the world. I want to say these bullies will account for nothing when they're older, but unfortunately for me, one of my main bullies now owns her own bakery and has a business degree.

You are beautiful, everyone is beautiful like you say. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Sixteen is the perfect age to discover yourself and your own values, don't let anyone impact that. From your story here, you sound like a sweetheart.

I'm 24 now and never really got over my middleschool and highschool bullies until this last week. One of my old acquaintances from highschool sought me out this month during her honeymoon to my new home country (the UK) and told me that she admired me. This girl I wasn't ever really close with admired me, this girl who I looked up to in our theatre group told me she missed me. She missed me because I was loud and always spoke my mind. She missed me because I was an open minded wiccan bisexual 16 year old girl in the middle of the bible belt in Georgia.

The lesson I took from her visit? Always be yourself. Never be afraid of being yourself. If these girls don't want to get to know you, it's their loss. <3

I came here with a rant and then read yours and wanted to let you know how special you are.

[Worba]

Well if looks truly don't matter to you, then the site you're describing may just not be a good place to hang out. Any place where RL pics are prominently displayed tends to provoke shallowness in many forumgoers... sometimes causing the place to devolve into a meat market. Not always - there are some where people manage to keep it tasteful, but if you're just looking for people with common interests and not looking to get hooked up, you might want to branch out into other sites that are more focused on people's interests and less on what they look like.

And write off the airheads - they're not worth it and don't deserve to be taking up rent in your head.

[Sukurachi]

I suspect the OP is talking about real life, as in at school, and not on some website.
I might be wrong, but I didn't see any mention of websites in his post.

Well if looks truly don't matter to you, then the site you're describing may just not be a good place to hang out. Any place where RL pics are prominently displayed tends to provoke shallowness in many forumgoers... sometimes causing the place to devolve into a meat market. Not always - there are some where people manage to keep it tasteful, but if you're just looking for people with common interests and not looking to get hooked up, you might want to branch out into other sites that are more focused on people's interests and less on what they look like.

And write off the airheads - they're not worth it and don't deserve to be taking up rent in your head.

[Worba]

Hmm. Guess I figured "website" when I saw the "LOL" in the quotes, but yeah... I guess it could be either.

Same basic thing though, imo.

[Sickhuntz56]

Nili, I want you to know how good your post made me feel. Thank you so much. <3 and I'm talking about real life mainly, but on Facebook too.

[Worba]

/nod

Either way, learn to recognize the hipsters and poseurs (of either gender), and steer clear of them - they've got nothing you want.

[Atalanta]

You're 16. Sorry to tell you this, but you're not going to get anything serious at that age unless you find someone mature, and that's pretty damn rare.

Kids are cruel. It's how it is.

[Rower]

I'm 26. I think 10 years ago it was a bit better, but stupid teenagers always existed. It's nothing new. Just ignore them.

[Sukurachi]

I'm 50, and can assure you that even 35 years ago, it was no better.

[Miyon]

Have you considered reading up on how to better improve the way you look at yourself? If you constantly feel uncertain, it will show, and most people will shy away from that. What kind of girls are you trying to approach? The regular A4 ones, with long blonde/brown hair, skinny as sticks and always wearing the newest clothes? What are your standards?