Kitty Urinating on Carpet Again

[Rhyela]

Hi all, our female cat, Mia, has been urinating on the carpet again. We've already spent hundreds of dollars to rid her of a nasty UTI, and now she's on a special diet to lower her pH. She wasn't peeing on the carpet again until we let both cats out at the same time again. Or, at least that seems to be around the time I noticed it again. There are several spots along the wall right in front of her litter box. I just don't know what else to do. Our old house still smells of cat urine and we're trying to sell it, and now the new one is going to be in the exact same boat. I hate to give her away to someone because she's really my husband's cat, and I'd rather gouge out my own eye than hurt him, but we've spent hundreds on Nature's Miracle and vet visits and we're still having this problem.

Both of us think it's because of the male cat. She hates him and they don't get along at all. He's really laid back and just wants to play, but whenever he's around she gets really tense. You can see it in her posture and everything. She was the first one, which is why I have a hard time giving her away if it's him that's making her so upset. But then at the same time, we don't know that that will truly solve the problem. What if we give my cat away only to have her still pee on the floor, and then we have to give her away, too?

Maybe we're terrible cat owners, but neither of us want to have to clean up cat pee for the rest of her life. She's less than five years old, and they live for up to 20 years. I don't think either of us have it in us to do this for that long of a time. Not to mention the cost of cleaning up after it all the time. We have two mortgages, we can't afford to be spending $30-$40 on a jug of Nature's Miracle every week or whatever.

I just don't know what to do. I've tried and tried and tried. I suppose we can try a different cat litter, though she never had any problems until her UTI and until he came along. She was fine after the UTI until we let them both in the house again.

I definitely think I'm done with pets after these two are gone. I just can't keep doing this for the rest of my life. I love animals, I really do, but I'm starting to wonder if I'm the right type of person to have them in my house. I can handle normal vet visits and normal maintenance and cleanup and expenses, but it's this other frustrating stuff I have a hard time with. It's like I can handle just about anything, but urinating on carpet is what will drive me over the edge every time. I gave my dog away because she was doing the same thing and ruined our carpet when we were trying to sell it, and now the cat's doing it. Animal urine is just my final straw, so to speak.

[Dewclaw]

Pee issues can be VERY frustrating, but if you can't handle pee issues, then you're probably right that you should not be a pet owner. At any rate,first step is to take the kitty back to the vet. Make sure the UTI has not flared up again. There are also medicines the vet can prescribe that can help calm her down as she adjusts to the presence of the male. How were introductions performed between the two? Slowly? Second, how many litter boxes do you have? It's probably best in your situation to have one per cat. If it's behavioral and badly ingrained, you may have to resort to limiting her to 1 small room with all the necessities until she gets used to going in the box as she should, then see about re-introducing her to the male (slowly!) Also make sure the urine smell is entirely gone. If it's there/ she can smell pee even when people can't and when she smells it, she thinks its on OK place to go. Nature's miracle is great, but you may want to use a black light to make sure you got it all.

[Rhyela]

We introduced them over a period of several weeks. First with no contact at all, then we swapped rooms so they could sniff each other's presence, then let them sniff each other through a door crack. Things were fine until they had full contact with one another. She has never liked other cats and always got poofy and agitated whenever one was near our house. I shouldn't have brought the second cat home, but I was sad after giving away my dog to a rescue.

We have two litter boxes, one for each cat. We have a third in the garage that I was going to use, but the two were working out fine until just recently. I thought about getting another urinalysis to see if it came back again. Before I did anything else, I was going to call the vet anyway to see what she thinks. We have some feliway spray, too.

In any case, I really don't think these two will ever get along. He won't leave her alone. She'll be laying on the couch and he just HAS to jump up and pounce on her, and she hisses and growls and runs away, and he continues to antagonize her. When we moved, they were separated again for a couple months.

I don't know, I just don't think she's the type of cat that wants another cat in the house, and I think as long as he's here there are going to be problems. If anything, I should probably find HIM a new home. He has a better chance anyway since he doesn't urinate on carpets and doesn't have a special diet.

This is really hard for me because my husband has been really down all day and won't talk. I definitely prefer to keep both of them, but neither he nor I want to deal with cat urine in our carpets for the next ten or twelve years. I suppose we could do what we were thinking and just keep the two cats separated forever - keep one locked up one day and the other locked up the next. But what kind of life is that?

[Rhyela]

Sorry for the double-post. I'm not giving up on her just yet. I did a lot of thinking today, and I refuse to just toss her in some shelter. I love her and my husband too much to do that to either of them. I am going to try to talk to my parents-in-law to see if they'd be willing to take one of the cats. If Mia being a solitary cat is the issue, then I would feel better about one of them going to someone we know. My mother-in-law has been pining over a cat since her last cat Sam had to be put down. My father-in-law has been quite adamantly against it, I think because of how Sam was (she used to pee on his pillow and she was really nasty to everyone except Libby). But I'm hoping that if my husband and I offer to give them $100 (the cost of surrendering an animal to the shelter), as well as the offer to take the cat back should anything go wrong (such as urinating on the carpet) so that my husband and I can take care of it, he will relent and let her have one of them.

The problem is that they're also trying to sell their house right now and likely don't want an animal in the way. I'd be willing to hold both of them, urine on the carpet or not, until they were in their new house if they were willing to take one of them.

I just don't have it in me to abandon either of them to some unknown fate unless it's the absolute last resort. I may get frustrated, but my love is too great to just give up without trying everything I can.

Sorry if my original email disgusted some folks. I just felt very defeated when I saw urine on the floor again. But, for now I'll try some things and hope for the best. And I'll definitely pray. A lot.

[Bowno]

I wish I had some sort of advice I could offer you. :c

All I can do is wish you the best of luck in solving the problem. It's hard to get rid of an animal no matter what. If your parents-in-law will take one of them off your hands that might just fix everything. And if they do, at least you still get to see the cat, right?

Either way, I hope the issue is resolved soon and that your cats are okay. :3

[Serendipity82]

I actually have a male cat that likes to pick on my female cat and they have been living together for 2 years now. It got to the point where he would attack her while she was using the litter box and after that she never came out of my room again, until very very recently (like within the last week). She has been perfectly happy living in my room with me, while my male cat mingles with the other male cat and my roommates. And even though my female cat has been venturing out and even eating with the two males, she still hisses at them and is particularly territorial of my bedroom, which she sees as "hers". And my male cat still tries to pick on her every chance he gets, especially when he knows she's using her littler box. I know she'd rather be an only cat, but the current situation seems to be working - I just shut my door while she uses her box and keep the door closed all day while I'm at work so my male doesn't get any ideas.

Don't give up on her yet Rhyela. You'll find something that works, I am sure <3 And for what it's worth, I completely hear you on the prescription diets. My male has to be on one for the same reason as your girl. It's expensive, but it's worked in the long run, though he still relapses once in a little while.

[Rhyela]

Thanks you guys. Serendipity, your male and female sound exactly like ours. He actually has tried to go after her a few times while she was in her box. One time I didn't realize he was in there and had closed the door, and when I heard screaming I opened the door to find poop all over the floor from where she evidently had hopped out while trying to go. x_x Poor thing. He really is relentless. He's not mean (or at least it doesn't seem to be hostility), just over-zealous when it comes to wanting to play. Or maybe it's a dominance thing and he wants to push her around all the time. The thought of getting a third cat to give him company has crossed my mind, but knowing my luck things would just blow up even worse.

[Rhyela]

Update: Mia's urinalysis and x-ray (we had that done, too) all came back fine. The vet wants to put her on a new long-term medication to treat bladder inflammation just in case.

I'm beginning to wonder at some things. One, did I scare her by running a vacuum cleaner while she was still inside the room with the door shut? It was quick, I was just trying to sweep up the litter that she had kicked onto the floor, but maybe that was enough to scare her? Though I don't understand why she'd urinate on the floor by the wall right in front of the litter box, rather than far away from it.

Two, we did just move a couple months ago. For the first three weeks or thereabouts, we had her locked up in a bathroom since she was still fighting that UTI and we didn't want her peeing on the new rug (hah, that worked out well, didn't it?). After that, when things looked like they were clearing up, we moved her to our guest bedroom for another two to three weeks or so. Skye, my male cat, had the rest of the house to himself. Once her UTI had finally been declared cured, we let her have the house to herself for a couple days with him locked up elsewhere, then tossed them back together.

I'm wondering if this isn't our fault. Perhaps between the move and the long time spent apart, it stressed her overmuch? I mean, they never got along before, but we kinda just let them back together again without any kind of "warm-up period", so to speak. I suppose neither my husband nor I thought anything of it since they had spent a few months together already. Maybe we tend to forget they are cats and not people. Maybe they needed to get to know each other again rather than just being thrown together in a new environment.

Anyway, we're going to try this medication and some wet food (we already have her on C/D dry), and most likely do this whole introduction process again. On that note, I do have a question. In the old house, she was the queen. She had ruled the roost for about four years before we brought Skye into the home. So, he got the newcomer treatment if that makes any sense. We tried to reinforce that she was still the dominant one. It didn't seem to last long, since he seemed to become the dominant male after she repeatedly chose to growl, hiss and flee even when he was trying to take a submissive approach (rolling onto his back and exposing his belly and stuff).

But now that we're in the new house, and he's been the one that's "ruled" it for most of the past two months, does that make it his territory now, and she the newcomer? I suppose to me, since she had been with us the longest, the new house was still her territory. But does new territory (house) make new rules? Not only are my husband and I new to multiple cat ownership, we've also never moved Mia before.

So yeah, if anyone has experience or advice, we would greatly appreciate it. We'll do everything we can to improve the situation, a shelter is only the last resort. I know it will take time to do this the right way, and the urinating on the floor likely won't disappear overnight, so I'm ready for some more aggravation or whatever. I just want it to pay off. I hate seeing my husband so sad, and I really hate the thought of leaving her in some cold cage in a place she doesn't know. Bleh.

[zedxrgal]

Kitties can be really tough at times. Honestly, TO ME, (former Vet Tech) this sounds like yes Skye is the dominant cat but it's more then that. Mia is a cat who is meant to be an only cat. Some people try multiple meetings with different cats to see if there's a meshing because they're determined to have a happy home with two cats. But who is this best for? You? Or the cats? That's the largest point humans forget. It's NEVER about what's best for the owner. It's about what's best for the pet. Mia NEEDS to be an only cat because that's her ingrained personality by the sound of it. I do not believe her urinating has anything to do with a physical problem.
I think it's all mental. She's fearful and having anxiety at this point over the mere smells of his being around so like most fearful creatures she pees. It's not something she can control because she's being forced into it. This IS NOT to say you're a bad pet parent. Not even close. You're a very very good pet parent.
I would suggest finding Skye a home with other enthusiastic kitties. He needs that. He truly does. It will help him in many ways in that it may also teach him some really good social kitty manners. Which he does seem to lack. Again. This isn't your fault. Cats are solitary by nature 100%. Humans change (or at least attempt to) this by wanting multiple cats. For some cats, this solitary instinct just never goes away. That's Mia.
Hop on Facebook if you have an account. Email friends and family. Then I'd suggest talking to local PetSmart & /or PetCo's and finding their kitty rescues. These rescues are EXCELLENT for kitties needing a home more fitting to their personalities. Research the rescue thoroughly before making a decision.
Keep them separated completely. That's the only way it would seem. Like make your room (or whomever "her" human is) her very own space. Give her cat tree's etc that only she can use. Separate EVERYTHING. Keep it that way.
Yes finding Skye a new home sucks because you love him. But it would be better then living with two cats who cannot tolerate each other and one who's acting out because their owners are still forcing them together.

This isn't meant to sound harsh hun. Sorry if it does.

Also. Where she's been urinating you can put pee pads there. That will at least protect the carpet if she's determined to pee in that exact spot.

Good luck

[Rhyela]

Hmm..... Don't worry Zed, it's not too harsh. Finding Skye a new home has been in the back of my mind for a few months now, which sucks because I really do love him. He brings me such joy. But at the same time, I can't bear to see Mia so stressed and fearful all the time. And don't worry, I've read in other articles that sometimes, cats are solitary and eventually you have to re-home the one you brought home. I knew from the beginning that it was a possibility, I suppose I just hoped that it wouldn't happen in our case. /sigh..... I really hate the thought of re-homing yet another pet. It breaks my heart. But he really wants someone to wrestle and play with, and she really wants to be left alone except for her people. It's not that I don't love her, too, it's just that he's so cuddly with me whereas she prefers to lay beside us rather than on us.

Bah. I will give it some serious thought. I just want what's best for both of them, even if it means not being with me. Thank you Zed. I admit you didn't say what I wanted to hear, but you did say what I needed to hear, and that's what's important.