Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

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Holgarr
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Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Holgarr »

"All that you need to know about boars can be summed up in the fact that if you wish to hunt them, you must have a specially made boar spear. This spear has a crosspiece on it to prevent the boar from charging the length of the spear, driving it all the way through his own body, to savage the human holding the other end."
- Boar and Apples, by T. Kingfisher

Most folks who grow up outside of rural areas have a poor notion of how large pigs are - and by extension, how large boars are.

God knows I did before discovering the stuff I'm putting in this post.

This is a domestic Yorkshire pig, adult, of average size, with an adult human and vehicle for scale comparison.
This is a Tamworth boar, a heritage breed closer to its wild cousins than the Yorkshire above.

It's amazing, the number of people who don’t understand how enormous, terrifying, and tenacious wild boar are.

They’re like if bears had knives protruding from their closed mouths and Didn’t Know When To Quit. Their survival instincts when they’re wounded aren’t “run away and minimize injury” it’s “take the thing that hurt you down with you” They also make sounds like someone crossed a pig with an alligator.

Their head and neck alone can be like the size of an entire human torso.
Also amazed at people who think domestic pigs are tiny, ‘cause we designed those things can get in the neighbourhood of a thousand pounds in ideal circumstances.
It’s like when people assume Tuna must be small because they’ve only ever experienced them in hockey puck form.

Pigs will eat people, if given the chance.
That’s why boar hunters use a team of very tenacious dogs to hold the boar so they can be speared without destroying you. The dogs must wear body armor and even then often experience severe injury.

I’ve heard stories of people shooting boars, and if it didn’t kill them, it just pissed them off.

WIld boar babies are rather cute...
...but the adults and their ferocity have been associated with warriors for thousands of years, from Mycenaean Greece, through Celtic Europe, and in Ancient Rome. A number of Roman legions also used a boar as their crest - I wonder did they squabble over which was the “right” one, the way a couple of Swiss cantons had a little war over whose bear was best…?

There was also Anglo-Saxon and pre-Viking helmet crests, right up to the late Middle Ages (famously, the white boar badge of Richard Duke of Gloucester, later Richard III of England), and the blue boar badge of the Earl of Oxford, more usually represented by the De Vere arms, quarterly gules and or, in the first a molet argent.
After Richard was defeated at Bosworth in 1485, there was a run on blue paint as inn-signs were changed to reflect new loyalties since Oxford was on the winning side…

And I wasn't kidding earlier, pigs will definitely eat people.
It gets mentioned in the movie “Snatch”, the book/movie “Hannibal” and the webcomic “Lackadaisy Cats”, among numerous other fictional sources, and IRL it’s suspected to be the reason why numerous missing persons have stayed missing.

Even in mythology, Odysseus’s old nurse recognizes him by the scar he got from the boar-tusk slash that almost killed him - it wasn't because he was a poor hunter, but because he was nearly destroyed by his prey.


So it really baffles me how often folks in WoW laugh off this hunter pet as a joke thing, naming them after various pork foodstuffs and such. Boars, even without the added armor and spikes Blizzard has inexplicably chosen to add to their newest models, are a surprisingly valid threat.
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Valnaaros
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Valnaaros »

I think that they usually aren't taken very seriously by players because Blizz doesn't take them very seriously. At times they are fewed as a threat, but often they are treated like jokes. Though, in a world of dragons, undead, and magic, they are a joke compared to those things ;)
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Wain
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Wain »

That was a good write-up :) They can be incredibly dangerous beasts IRL, and they still do kill people, but most people think of bacon I guess.

There are a few legendary ones in the game, though, like Agamaggan. And the felboars in Hellfire Peninsula were pretty terrifying if you ask me!
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Valnaaros
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Valnaaros »

Oh yes, there are definitely legendary boars and terrifying ones, but NPCs never seem afraid of them. They usually just task us with going out and killing them for some meat/organ.
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Teigan
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Teigan »

Interesting read, thanks for posting that. They are so much bigger than a pork chop. Mmmmm....pork chops. I made the best pork chops tonight! And now the boars will revenge their fallen brother, it seems.
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Boven
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Boven »

Wild boars are dangerous as all get out. Actually, many wild animals are far more dangerous than many folks believe (buffalo and bison are a good example)

I do love Ursula Vernon's (T. Kingfisher's 'real' name) writing, and she's had some pretty neat experiences. Her writing style can make even mundane things seem like a grand adventure.
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Holgarr
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Holgarr »

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/north-caro ... -wild-hog/

Eight feet long and five hundred pounds.
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Wain
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Wain »

Holgarr wrote:https://www.cbsnews.com/news/north-caro ... -wild-hog/

Eight feet long and five hundred pounds.
Wow. :shock:

I'd be wary of wild boar meat since they carry some really nasty parasites. But as long as it's safe...
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Albain »

Cooking thoroughly destroys the parasites. That's why for ..forever, pork had to be cooked to death.

I don't take boars seriously in WoW because of their ridiculous waddle. The graphics for their run animations just seem wrong.
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Re: Boars: MUCH scarier than most imagine...

Unread post by Rhyela »

Albain wrote:I don't take boars seriously in WoW because of their ridiculous waddle. The graphics for their run animations just seem wrong.
You shut your dirty mouth! :lol: That's the whole reason I still love vanilla boars! I wouldn't mind a visual update, but if they ever get rid of their adorable waddle and wiggle-run, I'll send Blizz a flaming bag of poo.

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