Requesting Help: Point of View Problems...

[Khishay]

I just got back from a long trip in Texas with an entire medical emergency ordeal finished with . For those who don't know, my mom went unconscious for a while (which actually turned out to be caused not by her cancer, but by the lobonox or something they gave her.. ugh), but she recovered. Although it should be a happy thing, it's not really. We're all stressed and basically returning to old habits, where we go into separate rooms and ignore each others existence. A tad gloomy and depressing, but I'm going to college next year anyways. *shrugs*

What does that have to do with points of view? Well! I've decided to throw myself back into my creative side, and begin drawings and what-not again. It's a great stress reliever, and helps to take my mind off things. There's the only problem that my happy-happy draw pictures side hasn't woken up yet. It's still kind of shell shocked. Whenever I pick up a pencil, pen, whatever... I just can't seem to do anything.

All the above stated (in a rather lengthy way, sorry 'bout that ) I'm starting up writing again, and am working on a book which I started writing a little over a year ago. I made the mistake a while ago of breaking the book into two halves, and now I need to make it into one again. So, I'm starting a rewrite to keep some consistency and hopefully along the way bring back my happy-happy drawing side. Except, I need some opinions, and I thought of no friendlier or better place to ask then here.

My issue is that I wrote the book in a strange perspective, alternating between two characters at random intervals. I've decided I need to focus on one and stick with that character, because two even get me confused! And with the dinky plot and history encompassed in the book... I don't need it any more confusing!

So, I have two choices to follow, and both are completely open to me. I just want to know what you guys would think would make a better story.

The basic plot is an assassin, controlled by “evil forces” , is told to kill a certain person without any knowledge of who that person is or why. Said assassin finds the target, fails at killing the person like 5 times, and decides to follow them, becoming friends along the way, of course! So these two travel around, the assassin trying to figure out why they need to kill this person, and the target trying to figure out why there's an assassin after them. I can either write from the point of view of the assassin, or, for lack of a better term, the target.

I'm being kind of, erm, subversive? about who they are, because I partially want just raw opinions, but I'm also still kind of shy about it. If there's anything else I need to detail, I'll happily throw out some more information on the characters/plot/ideas/theories/etc...


Anyways! Sorry for the large post. But, in short, who's point of view should I write from? The assassin or the target?




If this would be better in the Fan art and creative writing rather than off-topic... feel free to move it. I couldn't quite figure out where to place it... Technically I'm talking about a book, but it's nowhere near finished or anything. Then again, it IS creative writing, but I'm not posting the writing up yet, it's a question about the writing... Gah! I could go on all day about its x,y, and z, but then again its q too, but it should be s to go in, then again h, e, and w all seem... *bashes head against wall*

[Ibliisce]

Whenever I write, I write like that, especially when it's lengthy (the PoV swapping, though it's generally always third person)... I dun'no. You could keep the PoV of both if you wanted, but maybe alternate it by chapters? (I'm not sure if you're using chapters or not).

Though I chose assassin if you were going to focus on a specific <_<

[Sarayana]

Just judging by which story I'd be more likely to pick up from a quick description? I'd go with the assassin's pov. It sounds really interesting, the idea of trying to suddenly figure out why you're hired to kill that target, and I'm sure it'd make for an interesting story.

On the other hand, writing it from the pov of the target is different (the assassin's pov has kinda been done before, hasn't it?). My mind is already buzzing with how that one could play out, becoming the target of multiple assassination attempts, trying to figure out why, and befriending a stranger that has a stake in the same events.

Gah, now I can't choose! Sorry.

I'm sorry to hear about your mother. Although it sounds like things are complex, I hope she's recovering well.

[VelkynKarma]

I honestly think it'd be interesting to switch between the two, but barring that, if you have to pick just one...hm...

My immediate instinct is to say the assassin's point of view, because they know what's going on, so the story might not come across as confusing. If you're going for an action/suspense type plot, this is probably the view you want to take anyway. You'll be able to focus on the actions of the assassin trying (and failing) to kill off their target, and later on figuring out exactly what's going on.

If, however, you're interested in a more 'mystery' style feel, the target might be a better perspective. They won't know what's going on, which might make the story a bit confusing at first, but if it's a mystery story intentional confusion is a plus. Not only that, you can have the target trying to figure out why they're being attacked--or, depending on the reason for assassination in the first place, they might even know already and be trying to avoid it. That, compounded with this suspicious new friend of theirs, might make an equally interesting plot.

There's also the option of writing both sides and piecing them together afterwards at like intervals (for example, write Kill Attempt 1 from both the Assassin's and Target's POV's, then arrange them near each other in the final manuscript).

For the love of God, NO SPARKLY VAMPIRES. NO. JUST NO.

~VelkynKarma

[Khishay]

Bwahahaha... *adds sparkles and vampires*

But seriously... I think maybe writing about the one, or having the mindset to write about one, would help me figure out where I could place other view? Or something like that? It's just stupid hard to choose!

I wish both weren't so viable... argh! But I'm definately soaking in all the advice here. I might try giving the two perspectives another shot. I just feel like there's a certain character development lost when trying to weave in both.

[Azunara]

I admit I clicked vampires, just to be silly. (Only to find out someone else had the same idea. I thought I would be unique in my plan!)

Really though, I like the PoV of the target. I mean like Sarayana said, it would be so interesting to see that point of view. Worse comes to worse, when you're switching personality, put the character's name (whoever is speaking for that chapter.) so both you AND the reader know who it is. I've seen this done in a book before and I admit he had like three or four different characters, all speaking their PoV and he pulled it off pretty good.

[Sarayana]

Well, several books use that type of perspective switching successfully. It really depends how it's done. it can be a powerful literary tool. I can't recall the book now, but one I read stepped away from the all-knowing narrator and used the perspective switching with first-person narration. It was fun.

Let me dig around my bookshelves once I'm done with my chores today, I'll see if I can find some good examples.

[VelkynKarma]

I will just add that doing it from two perspectives requires an obvious break between those two perspectives. For example, chapter 1 might be the assassin and only the assassin, while chapter 2 is the target and only the target.

I can't tell you how many times I've read books or short stories or fanfiction or whatever when the writer switches between perspectives in the same scene and that just strikes me as incredibly amateurish, not to mention confusing. If you're hearing one characters' thoughts you shouldn't all of a sudden be magically able to shift over to another characters' thoughts in the same scene, unless the first character happens to be an actual mind reader. You will throw your reader off.

~VelkynKarma

[Saturo]

...I once read a Star Trek fanfic where the main character was a telepath. The writer wrote down the thoughts of EVERY SINGLE THING within fifty meters. Was amusing.

[Khishay]

Well, I guess if done right the whole "hearing thoughts" thing might work.. although I think I would send my computer through a wall if I read the fanfic with the mind-reader! Mind reading just seems like it could be one of the most useful, or the most ANNOYING talents ever. I will admit though, I started out with "he thought..." and the second I read it I was like... No. Way. Not happening. So there really are no instances of them thinking to themselves, except for the occasional muttering under the breath, what, and return what, I didn't say nuthins, yous crazy?

Part of the reason I'm really considering only one pov is that I've always found books with several different characters and, I guess more "story swapping" then pov, to be the most annoying books ever. I hate reading through a chapter, thinking the whole while "why do I care? Oh, that's right, I don't," and then ending up flipping through half the book to reach the characters I DID like.. That could just be me, or it could just be that the cheesey fantasy novels I usually read don't always develop good characters I'm actually having that problem right now as I read Don Quixote (summer reading blah). It's huge and daunting, because you just KNOW every time you meet a new character they're going to explain their entire life's story and end up having, like, nothing really to do with the book! I just don't want something like that where the reader goes "Oh great, here we go again..."

I'm starting to wonder now... Maybe I shouldn't focus so much on a rewrite as I should seperating the two points of view. Might also help get a feel on if one really is better than the other, or if I have to keep both. Or If I should add mind-reading, sparkles, and vampires. ...O wait-a-sec

[Sarayana]

Bah, my bookshelf was of no use. I really can't put my finger on what book I'm reminded of... Might have to do with the lack of sleep and 8 hours straight of cleaning.