are people in WOW REALLY this mean all the time on purpose?

[Doc Privas]

Those people are also unfriendly in their real lifes. I'm doing right now practical training in a hotel for my management school and I must say most of the people working there are really unfriendly and don't care for who you are. So no wonder that in WoW people are like this.

[Sukurachi]

I don't normally work with the public (ie: my day-job isn't one where I actually am required to interface at all with other people), but that was how I payed for my graduate studies, working in a shop.

I've ALWAYS gone out of my way to be nice to strangers, even people who are asshats. (I always find it odd when people whose "career" it is to deal with the public are mean). I figure, treat others as I'd like to be treated.

I'm TRYING not to let this incident get to me, but maybe I'm particularly sensitive this time of year (shorter days and all, "winter depression" coming), but I've been having trouble getting into Brewfest this year. I'm doing Coren Direbrew on one or two of my 5 eligible toons only since this incident... my heart's not in it now.

it also doesn't help that my husband has a job that takes him out of town sunday night to the next friday evening, every week, from late august until october, every year. Even after 10 years, I'm just not used to it. Last night I had a good crying spell after he left.

[Shade]

I'm TRYING not to let this incident get to me, but maybe I'm particularly sensitive this time of year (shorter days and all, "winter depression" coming), but I've been having trouble getting into Brewfest this year. I'm doing Coren Direbrew on one or two of my 5 eligible toons only since this incident... my heart's not in it now.

Seriously?

I'm not trying to be harsh, really I am not. But if you are old enough to be married, you are more then old enough to understand that there are jackasses out there. Their behavior has nothing to do with you or your own actions-they are going to be a jackass no matter how good you or someone else does-they'll find something to pick about if not in that group in particular then in another.

Get over it. Someone bitches about your dps just honestly tell them that you are not geared, or tell them to f-off.

Nobody has the right to belittle another player in such a manner. Offering suggestions, sure. Being a little critical with the end goal of helping someone improve-fine.

But this is a service that we all pay for to use. You do NOT have to sit there and listen to a power bloated idiot who thinks they are all that because they do top dps in a freaking game that most of the world doesn't even give a fig about.

Don't let it get to you for a moment more. They were jerks, sure, but you shouldn't give them any power over you by letting them change the way you play.

[Sukurachi]

I'm old enough to know that emotional reactions to events are often quite uncontrollable, and that telling someone to "get over it" isn't the most useful response.

I'm old enough to understand that sometimes peoples' reactions to events in their lives are filtered through all the previous events of those lives, and through events that are on-going in their lives.

I'm also old enough to understand that you're not going out of your way to BE mean here, but I'm also old enough to tell you that your comment really isn't helpful, and is actually quite "cutting".

"Logically", "consciously" I understand that I should just let it slide and not let it affect me. But that isn't how emotional reactions always work. They aren't always that easily controlled and compartmentalized.

If they were, we'd live in a far better world, one without war, without famine, without strife.

One day, you will understand that there are times when the emotions get the better of you.

[Worba]

well, other than a REALLY bad experience once doing Culling of Strath. this is really the first time I've come across such incredibly vicious and mean treatment.

I've been doing Coren every day since it started, on all my 85s (I have at least 5), and have had no issues until this particular run.

I can't have been so bad, because a number of times, the groups I was with just kept reforming to redo the same thing over and over until everyone had had a chance for the multiple possible drops.

It was just so strange and hurtful to be singled out for such a personal attack.

1) Anyone who considers Coren SRS BZNS is a silly doofus who must be ignored.

2) If you're still questioning your group contribution despite this, I strongly urge you to d/l recount (if you haven't already) - this way you know in advance how much DPS you are contributing... and how much everyone else is too.

[CrystalKitten]

I'm old enough to know that emotional reactions to events are often quite uncontrollable, and that telling someone to "get over it" isn't the most useful response.

I'm old enough to understand that sometimes peoples' reactions to events in their lives are filtered through all the previous events of those lives, and through events that are on-going in their lives.

I'm also old enough to understand that you're not going out of your way to BE mean here, but I'm also old enough to tell you that your comment really isn't helpful, and is actually quite "cutting".

"Logically", "consciously" I understand that I should just let it slide and not let it affect me. But that isn't how emotional reactions always work. They aren't always that easily controlled and compartmentalized.

If they were, we'd live in a far better world, one without war, without famine, without strife.

One day, you will understand that there are times when the emotions get the better of you.

/cheer

I'm someone that deals with anxiety/depression, some caused from memory related issues, so I just have to say VERY well said. I can say that there's VERY little that pisses me off more than someone saying "eh, just get over it, it's not a big deal" even if I know they're trying to help <.< Just makes me think "Really? You can see into my head? How my brain works? That's incredible!"

Hopefully things will look up for you Sukurachi, like.. you getting which ever mounts you're hoping for from the keg, or whatever else! Sometimes people just suck and the best thing is to walk away from that particular situation for a bit and let yourself cool down.

[Sukurachi]

agh! I just want the stupid beer-mounts on my toons that don't ALREADY have them!!!
gurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
stupid RNG

(of course, stupid me, I guess maybe I shouldn't do the dailies with toons that don't NEED the mounts, eh?)

[Zuilu]

I'm old enough to know that emotional reactions to events are often quite uncontrollable, and that telling someone to "get over it" isn't the most useful response.

I'm old enough to understand that sometimes peoples' reactions to events in their lives are filtered through all the previous events of those lives, and through events that are on-going in their lives.

I'm also old enough to understand that you're not going out of your way to BE mean here, but I'm also old enough to tell you that your comment really isn't helpful, and is actually quite "cutting".

"Logically", "consciously" I understand that I should just let it slide and not let it affect me. But that isn't how emotional reactions always work. They aren't always that easily controlled and compartmentalized.

If they were, we'd live in a far better world, one without war, without famine, without strife.

One day, you will understand that there are times when the emotions get the better of you.

Compleeetely agree here, happens to me sometimes too. I have quite severe depression and bi polar disorder, so when something upsets me, even if I KNOW it shouldn't, sometimes I really can't help what my emotions do. Best I can do is try to tell myself it doesn't matter.

[Comett]

Zaaaw. I know how you feel *hugs* It's all well and good to tell you to brush it off. Although I tend to do it 99% of the time, and I logically KNOW I'm fine/in the right/a nice person/whatever, sometimes you just can't get it out of your head.

Perhaps look to queue with friends/guildies/Petopians, or if you're really worried about it, there's always next year Or maybe a friend can do your daily Coren runs for you. Lots of solutions. Though I do feel the best bet is just to get back on the horse!

[Worba]

Emotions just need something useful to focus themselves on. When someone says something mean that you (logically) know is completely without merit, try to find it in your heart to pity them for being so simultaneously angry and dumb.

Not a 100% fix, nothing is when we're talking about emotions, but better than allowing radioactive jerks to take up rent in your head.

[Sukurachi]

well, I've put them on ignore, at least on that toon, so I KNOW I won't have to party with them again in random.

probably later today, I'll do another run with another toon or two, so I WILL slowly get back on the proverbial horse.

[Worba]

Rock on

[GormanGhaste]

I'm TRYING not to let this incident get to me, but maybe I'm particularly sensitive this time of year (shorter days and all, "winter depression" coming), but I've been having trouble getting into Brewfest this year. I'm doing Coren Direbrew on one or two of my 5 eligible toons only since this incident... my heart's not in it now.

it also doesn't help that my husband has a job that takes him out of town Sunday night to the next Friday evening, every week, from late August until October, every year. Even after 10 years, I'm just not used to it. Last night I had a good crying spell after he left.

I've been dealing with depression off and on for as long as I can remember, and one of the things that helps me the most is going for regular walks.

Whenever I'm separated from my other half, I like to write him handwritten letters, either on stationery or in a journal.

[Lisaara]

well, I've put them on ignore, at least on that toon, so I KNOW I won't have to party with them again in random.

probably later today, I'll do another run with another toon or two, so I WILL slowly get back on the proverbial horse.

Do that. Also what makes me feel better is music. :3 Music is my muse.

[CrystalKitten]

well, I've put them on ignore, at least on that toon, so I KNOW I won't have to party with them again in random.

probably later today, I'll do another run with another toon or two, so I WILL slowly get back on the proverbial horse.

Do that. Also what makes me feel better is music. :3 Music is my muse.

Ah yes, the wonders of blasting some cathartic rock is amazing I highly reccomend Shake Tramp from marianas trench.. <.< that song is VERY fun to sing/scream along with when you're in an angry mood >.>

[Sarantha]

Strange as it may sound, when I'm upset, I listen to "Carry On My Wayward Son" by Kansas. Kind of a "just keep going, you'll eventually get a break" song, that also happens to be the theme song for my favorite TV show. Its my feel-good song and just kinda helps take a lot of stress out of the day for me.

When I am angry as opposed to neurotic/sad upset, thats where Nightwish or Tristania come in. Operatic metal is great for when you just want to listen to an angry-sounding or loud song.

[Nightsights]

not just in wow or any mmo's, games etc. just in RL there are mean ppl. over the internet ppl can hide behind their screen names/characters and just act anyway they want to. irl most of them will be afraid to say anything, because there will probably be physical pain/repercussions if they did.

[Morven]

Plus, it's way easier to mistake peoples' tone and intentions in text, which exacerbates the problem of people being jerks.

And everywhere has assholes. Heck, Wikipedia had people sending credible death threats, and stalkers that ended up being arrested and jailed. Over an encyclopedia!

[Shade]

One day, you will understand that there are times when the emotions get the better of you.

Assumptions are never a good thing. I've fought with depression all my life, among some other very nasty situations. I understand how troublesome emotions can be, truly. My best friend is a manic depressive bipolar, and my mother has pretty bad bouts of depression, as do I. I know how cutting some things can feel at the time they are said or done, and how upsetting they can be.

Really wasn't trying to be harsh, so please don't take it that way. I actually have seen you around here on the boards and respect you as a helpful member of the community.

I was bullied horridly in high school, until I realized one day that some random girl's opinion of me only had value if I gave her that power over me. Once I realized that, after high school, what she said or did to me in the long run meant absolutely nothing in the long scheme of things, I was able to stand up to her. I told her that there were a number of opinions that matter to me in my life, and her's wasn't one of them. She never bothered me again, after being my waking nightmare for three years of school.

But the point I was trying to make in my rushed post this morning was that these things only have so much power as you give them. If I was harsh I apologize, but I can be overly blunt at times, especially on a lack of sleep. Don't let someone belittle you or push you into a corner where you are afraid to play a game that you pay for. Letting go of an insult to yourself is hard-lord knows I get very obsessive and worried about how things I say come out at times and spend more time stressing over things then is healthy-but once you start ignoring idiots you try to get you down, it does get easier.

[Sukurachi]

Apology accepted, Shade