Need your guys's opinon or any advice

[Redith]

Now I figured you guys are the best people to talk to this about because you guys are not biased to my situation. My friends are biased toward my GF and my family is biased toward my job.
Anyway my current situation is this. I have an ok job being private security for this old guy. I work 3 nights a week from 7pm to 7 am. I live kinda spiraticly all over, either at my parents house, my friends house or this guys house I work at. I have a girlfriend that I have been dating for 3 months and have fell in love with. Now heres the complicated situations.
I can't live like this, I have to do..SOMETHING! Id like to get my own place but to do that id have to get a better job. There are a few better jobs I could do and well..WANT to do but they wuld take me away from my girlfriend. I am starting to want to get back into a military combat job, I loved being all hardcore and doing a job that was high speed, low drag. But like I said, I love my girlfriend and I don't want to do anything that might strain or break our relationship. The other option is go back to the academy in napa but that ALSO would put some strain since I would be going to the academy 5 days a week.

Right now I think based on my current situation the best course of action is this. Stay with my current job until July. If I am still with my girl and still love her this much I will propose to her and hopefully get engaged. Then at least she knows im serious about her and maybie it will cause less strain If I decide to go to the academy

[Lisaara]

Well why not get into the military? Sure it'll take you from your girl but if she loves you...she'll wait for you.

[zedxrgal]

After three months of being together IN MY OPINION isn't enough to adjust what you want to do with your life. I agree that if she truly loves you and is "the one" then she'll wait. Plain and simple.
What future will you have with any woman if you keep putting off what you want for someone else?? Will you truly be happy or just biding time?
Personally, and I am only speaking my opinion, I wouldn't be making myself miserable by staying in a job that doesn't pay enough and bouncing house to house just to be with a mate I've only been with for three months. I'm sorry but I wouldn't.

[Moore]

After three months of being together IN MY OPINION isn't enough to adjust what you want to do with your life. I agree that if she truly loves you and is "the one" then she'll wait. Plain and simple.
What future will you have with any woman if you keep putting off what you want for someone else?? Will you truly be happy or just biding time?
Personally, and I am only speaking my opinion, I wouldn't be making myself miserable by staying in a job that doesn't pay enough and bouncing house to house just to be with a mate I've only been with for three months. I'm sorry but I wouldn't.

I'll agree with most of this. It probably isn't what you'd like to hear. I would however be realistic on the waiting thing I really hate to be that guy with no faith in people but these days I just wouldn't expect anyone to wait around for me.

[Tufak]

I have to agree with the views that you two need more time before you're engaged.

I don't know if this would work for you, but my brother makes good money as a prison guard. According to him it's surprisingly low stress, but also allows for moments where you get to use combat expertise. Maybe a job like that would work for you?

[Redith]

I have to agree with the views that you two need more time before you're engaged.

I don't know if this would work for you, but my brother makes good money as a prison guard. According to him it's surprisingly low stress, but also allows for moments where you get to use combat expertise. Maybe a job like that would work for you?

Prison guard academy is in Napa lmao

[Tufak]

Same place as the police academy, huh?

Hmm...if that's the case, I'd go with police instead.

I did some thinking about this last night. You mentioned 'stay at current job until July, then propose'. You're at three months with her now. Waiting until July would be another eight. So that's eleven months, or almost a year, which honestly isn't that bad for knowing one another before proposing.
While I honestly think that you would do better to head to Napa now and just see her on the weekends, thus improving the chances that when you two do marry you'll be able to support her and create a home for yourselves, if you would rather not strain a still blossoming romance, that might be your best idea.

[Lisaara]

I wouldn't propose unless you really knew her well....

My fiance didn't propose to me til 2 years after we've been together.

[Dewclaw]

You should talk to your gf about this. Lasting relationships are based on trust, communication, and compromise. See what she says.

I also agree with the others about 3 months not being very long. Give it more time before you propose.

[CrystalKitten]

You should talk to your gf about this. Lasting relationships are based on trust, communication, and compromise. See what she says.

This, I'd say is probably the best advice, but I agree with a lot of other people as well. 3 months is a bit fast, and you want to make sure it's not just infatuation before working your life around her. Especially if it's reworking plans that you'd already made, or really would like to do. Talking with her about it is the best option, as it will let you see if she's on the same page as you, as well as how she might handle compromise, or working out the many issues that come up during a long term relationship.

[Worba]

Right now I think based on my current situation the best course of action is this. Stay with my current job until July. If I am still with my girl and still love her this much I will propose to her and hopefully get engaged. Then at least she knows im serious about her and maybie it will cause less strain If I decide to go to the academy

Yes give it some time but you don't need to propose to let her know you are serious.

And it sounds like these other careers are not so much a matter of "if", as "when"; you want something you can grow into and that could support a family, or even just get you a house in an area you want to live in. If that requires heavy commitment, well that's how it is in this economy.

So I would let your GF know you are going to be training for one of these jobs in the not too distant future, and see what she says - you don't need to drop any bombshells on her, she can connect the dots herself.

[Helsinki]

I agree with pretty much everything already posted. And just keep in mind that being engaged - or even married - doesn't mean she'll wait for you or approve of your goals. In a perfect world it would, but unfortunately we live in reality. Do what's best for you first, and she'll do what's best for her - and hopefully those things can co-exist and you can stay together

[Impulse]

You should talk to your gf about this. Lasting relationships are based on trust, communication, and compromise. See what she says.

This, I'd say is probably the best advice, but I agree with a lot of other people as well. 3 months is a bit fast, and you want to make sure it's not just infatuation before working your life around her. Especially if it's reworking plans that you'd already made, or really would like to do. Talking with her about it is the best option, as it will let you see if she's on the same page as you, as well as how she might handle compromise, or working out the many issues that come up during a long term relationship.

^
dat.

Dating someone for 3 months is certainly not long enough to move on to something more serious.
You should decide together with your gf and come to an agreement about what's "really" best for two of you instead you suffering by yourself with the concerns.